Kelvin Eludes Draft, Stays in School August, 2000 - Orlando, FL Apparently fearful of the day when he might have to face the possibility of a military draft, Kelvin has enrolled in a college degree program…again! As of August 2000, it should be impossible for Kelvin to be drafted since he began work on his doctorate at the University of Central Florida where he also works (see related story: COPP). "Well, I have a maximum of seven years to finish the program before my credits start to expire," Kelvin reported. "That means I don't have to worry about basic training for at least that long." (Kelvin seemed unaware that the military isn't usually interested in drafting thirty-three year olds, nor could he provide any evidence that any of the armed services are drafting anyone anymore.) Sources close to Kelvin suspect that once this docorate is complete he will simply find another field to study and, therefore, stay in school indefinitely. Other sources think that perhaps completing military basic training would go a long way toward reducing his rapidly expanding waistline, however. Kelvin's intended doctorate will be in Curriculum and Instruction. Return to Halfbaked Headlines

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Page Created: December, 2000 Last Updated On: Author: Kelvin Thompson Contact: kthompso@mail.ucf.edu at University of Central Florida